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We no longer want a partner who is a "project." We want a partner who is a .
Sometimes, the "click" feels like anxiety because the person is unpredictable. A sunny relationship might feel "boring" at first if you are used to chaos. Give it time. That calm is safety.
Data from relationship science backs this up. The Gottman Institute has found that the number one predictor of divorce isn't fighting; it is contempt. Stormy relationships are full of contempt. Sunny relationships are full of admiration. That click you feel? It is often just your soul sighing in relief because you have found someone who admires you as much as you admire them. You are the author of your love life. If your history has been filled with storm clouds, you can intentionally pivot to sunshine.